originally posted 8:12am6/7/2018
This message below was sent to the guy who had a dating profile that said he was a positive person who focused on the glass beign half full but then claimed that it was hard to find positive happy people and that he had little time for negativity and or drama. this is a version of my response to his profile ad:
Grddrmr:
a bit of a hint to find what you are looking for: in every single person/entitiy/creature alive one can find either beauty, celebration, peaceful calmness, HOPE, positivity OR drama, negativity, sadness, fear, frustration, anxiety, issues, neurosis .... BOTH worlds exist in every human being, and probably in every creature, certainly every mammal. In some oriental cultures they call it the yin/yang.
Also, one tends to see/find what one's subconsious brain is paying attention to.. If you focus on being concerned or worried about coming across more drama/negativity, chances are .. you are going to find it.. whereas if you over look how people handle frustration and focus on the goodness in their heart and what parts about them you celebrate and or are grateful for, then you will be more in tune with that.
just like the phrase "love is blind".. because those people in love focus only what they see with the love within their own hearts.
if within your own heart, if you are truly practicing focusing on your own gratitude, your own appreciation for yourself, chances are then that practice will start to carry over to how you see others as well.
I also heard again recently the thought repeated that : "that which bothers you in other people, is usually a trait that might bother you about yourself" .... I know when I do a self study, I can see the truth in that. then again, i can see the truth in most things. which is ironic because I often am the one who automatically plays devils advocate for that. though recently my son has taken over that role, so I realized if I am going to teach him to see the caring and beauty in people's hearts, then I would have to change my own focus as well.
Point is. everyone has what you fear or want to avoid.. true, some have it more, some have it less, but that detail won't matter if you fear it so in every person.
As a thought experiment,
try finding in each person that irritates you, something about the core of their own pain that leads you to a feeling of either connection or appreciation for their hearts, even if how they express their hearts is annoyingly grotesque to you. (i know, it's easier said then done. way easier said then done, but try it out with each person on here, and maybe you might see some different results maybe. maybe not.. but all of life is a learning process and it's much more peaceful to see the good in people then the not so great parts).
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