Pet peeve 1:
To me one of the worst things you can do is to tell someone the phrase
"You need to go see a therapist" or "go see a professional" bc that is telling a pwrson that they are not good enough for you to listen to them. That YOU are not willing to be the person to listen them .. that the are worthy enough to have YOUR ears. If you don't have time to listen to them or even worse don't want to listen to them, then ask them to write it all out in a letter to you. So at least they have hope you will listen to them and it also gives them a chance to listen to themselves.
If they don't want to write it out, tell them to record it into an recording and when you get a chance you will listen to it but emphasize that before they send it to you that the first take a moment to listen to the whole thing themselves first. (Btw if they do actually send it to you, andyou feel you are too busy, tell them the phrase I would like for you to listen to it with me, let's set up a time for you to listen to it with me.
In most cases they will never send anything to you but they will feel like you care a little more then if you had just shunted them off to some 'professional'
If the actually send something to you, it means there is something they really needed you to specifically hear. If you are terrified to listen to it with them then set up a time with a professional yourself and invite them to listen to it with you with the professional but make it is clarified that the professional isn't there for them, that you hired them for YOU.
Pet peeve #2
The most ridiculous phrase ever: live each day like it's your last. Fuck NO.. bc if you actually lived each day like it was your last you would never do anything for tomorrow. You would be living in a way where you were waiting to die.
Sure you would maybe treasure each moment a little bit more, but there is another way of accomplishing that without having to live each day as if it is your last..
And that is to live each day as if it is your first.. with child like wonder and awe and inspiration and with hope and intrigue and excitment and delight at each new lesson.
3rd pet peeve:
Run away from bullies, narcissists, toxic people. They are monsters. Maybe but eve monsters need love and compassion. Compassion around them will keep you mentally and emotionally safe. Okay sre if they are physically violent then keep your physical distance but don't make yourself unavailable.
Recognize that these people are all desperately hurting souls in deepneed of compassion for their pain.
It's possible to be around them without getting harmed or hurt yourself and thata is through acceptance and compassion and amusement.
If you don't know how to do this, then practice those skills on yourself or someone you find less scary and work your way up to the most challenging folks.
4th pet peeve: folks who dont listen to their kids.. that includes myself when I am unable to do that because I am in too much pain myself but it's irks me when folks don't listen to kids opinions or dismiss there views as a matter of principle
5th pet peeve: saying that you should ween a kid off of breastfeeding on some culturally accepted timeline. Hell NO.
When should you stop breastfeeding - when the kid says they are ready!!
("Says"..yes.. ie , old enough to communicate with you that they don't need you for that part of their life anymore)
6th pet peeve - when people tell you to relax for you when really it is bc they don't know how to handle strong emotions... Hell baby, don't relax if you aren't ready to.. relax when you are goddam ready and when you feel safe to do so!!!
7th pet peeve - when people tell others to stop playing the victim or being the victim or to get out of the victim mindset..
Excuse me, but they ARE victims. Everyone is a victim of life. Life happens outside of everyones control. Life is not in your control.
People are not in your control.
You canNOT take responsibility for life or others people's actions. you ARE the fucking victim there..
But now that you have been victimized and have been out in a situation where you are utterly helpless and hopeless and can't do anything to get out of it, fucking recognize your how helpless you are and recognize the beauty of your existence.
You might feel like it all sucks at that moment and yes it does.. embrace that suckiness and see how it's awffullness isome o profound and amazing!
Revel in the suckiness! Hate the suckiness. Appreciate the ugliness the awffullness the overwhelming suckiness.
Embrace it!!!
Become aware of the opportunity it gives you.
Celebrate your victimhood and wear it proudly -. Bc you are fucking surviving it somehow!!!
Yep, these ideas may have offended you and you may have massively disagreed with them. Sigh oh well. I acknowledge your offense and disagreement.
I am not changing for you.
But maybe some of you will recognize the truth inside some of the statements and beliefs. And to those that do, a humble appreciation for your being willing to think outside the norm and for recognizing an opposing viewpoint to the standard norm.
I hope you will connect to us through our Facebook channels and our YouTube channels
And will find a way to help support us in our dreams and goals.
Thank you.
#2022
#controversial thoughts
#outsidetheboxthinking
#outsidethenorma
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